When you order flowers for a funeral home, you should have four things ready: the full name of the deceased, the name of the funeral home, the date and time of the visitation, and the names you want on the card. The flowers should be at the funeral home before the visitation begins.
We’re a florist on Steinway Street in Astoria, and five funeral homes sit within a mile of our shop, on 30th Avenue and Ditmars Boulevard.
Table of Contents
Start with the obituary
The obituary usually answers the first questions before you have to ask them. Funeral homes post it on their website, and it normally lists:
- where the visitation will be held, with the date and the hours
- where and when the funeral Mass or service will take place, if it’s somewhere else, such as the family’s church
- any request from the family, such as donations instead of flowers
Look for that last point first. If the family has named a charity “in lieu of flowers,” that request comes first, and the kind thing is to honor it. Not every tradition sends flowers, either. Jewish families traditionally receive food at the shiva house, or donations in the person’s name, rather than flowers at the funeral, and flowers aren’t usually part of a Muslim funeral. Practice varies within every faith, so follow the family’s lead. Our guide to funeral flower etiquette covers what to send instead and what different faiths expect.
You’ll often see a Send Flowers button on the obituary page as well. On the pages of the funeral homes near our shop, that button opens a separate online flower store run by another company rather than by the funeral home itself. You can order through it. If you’d rather talk to the florist who will make the piece, call us instead. Our guide to what funeral flowers cost in New York explains what changes when you order directly.
What the funeral home needs on the order
A funeral home sets out flowers by the name of the person who passed. The details on the order matter more than the street address, so give us these:
- The full name of the person who passed away. Spell it as it appears in the obituary.
- The name of the funeral home. In Queens, one building can be home to more than one funeral home. Two funeral homes share an address on Ditmars Boulevard in Astoria, for example, so the address alone doesn’t tell the driver which one.
- The date and time of the visitation. Add the room or chapel if the obituary names one.
- The names for the card. Use your full name, or your group’s name if several of you are sending one piece together, so the family can see who it came from.
The same funeral home may be holding two or three visitations on the same day in different rooms, and the name and time on the order are how the staff know where each piece belongs.
When the flowers should arrive
They should arrive before the visitation opens. The funeral home arranges the flowers around the casket before the family arrives, and a piece that comes in during visitation is hard to place without disturbing anyone.
At the funeral homes near our shop, most visitations run in one block in the afternoon before the funeral, starting between 2 and 4:30 and ending between 6 and 9 in the evening. The funeral Mass or service is usually the next morning, between 9 and 11, often at the family’s church. Some families hold a short visitation on the morning of the service instead, an hour or so before it begins.
For an afternoon visitation, the piece needs to be at the funeral home by early afternoon that day. A morning visitation leaves very little time on the day itself, so we arrange those deliveries with the funeral home ahead of time. Either way, give us the visitation time when you order and we’ll plan around it.
Many Greek Orthodox families in Astoria hold the Trisagion, a short prayer service with a priest, at the funeral home on the evening before the funeral. Flowers sent for the visitation are already in place for it.
Standing sprays, wreaths, crosses, hearts and the casket spray are made by hand for each funeral, so none of them is same-day work. Most of ours are built on roses, often with lilies, chrysanthemums or hydrangeas. Tell us the visitation date and we’ll tell you what we can make in time. A vase arrangement or a plant for the family’s home is more flexible.
Funeral home, church or the family’s home
Most pieces go to the funeral home for the visitation. That’s where the standing sprays, wreaths, crosses and hearts are set out around the casket, and where the family sees them. The casket spray lies on top of the casket, and the immediate family usually orders it. Cousins, friends of the family or a group from work often go in together on a standing spray or a wreath. All of these are funeral flowers for the service, and they go to the funeral home unless the family tells you otherwise.
If the obituary lists no visitation and only a service at a church, ask the funeral director where the flowers should go. Churches don’t all handle flowers the same way before a funeral Mass, and the funeral director will know how that church does it. The same goes for the cemetery: don’t send anything there unless the family asks, and check with the funeral director first if they do.
Flowers for the family’s home are a separate decision. A vase arrangement, a white orchid plant or a fruit basket sent to the house stays with the family in the days after the funeral, and it doesn’t need to arrive on the day itself. That’s why we keep sympathy flowers sent to the home apart from the pieces for the service.
Sending flowers from out of town
If you can’t be at the service, the order works the same way. Find the funeral home in the obituary and order from a florist who delivers there. If it’s in our delivery area, we’ll confirm its receiving hours before anything leaves the shop.
We need the same four details. If you’re ordering from another country or time zone, add a phone number where you can be reached during New York business hours, in case a question comes up about the funeral home or the piece.
We deliver to funeral homes in Queens, Brooklyn, Manhattan, the Bronx and Nassau County. If the obituary hasn’t been posted yet, call the shop with the person’s name and the neighborhood. We know the funeral homes around us and can usually find the right one, and we confirm the details with them before we start on the piece.
Common questions
Who do you address funeral flowers to?
The funeral home is the delivery address, and the person who passed is the name on the order, spelled as the obituary spells it. Your name goes on the card. Flowers for the house are addressed to the closest family member instead.
Should you send flowers to the funeral home or the church?
Send them to the funeral home for the visitation, unless the obituary lists only a church service. In that case, ask the funeral director, who will know how that church receives flowers.
Can you bring flowers to the funeral home yourself?
It’s possible, but having them delivered before the visitation is simpler. A piece carried in while the room is full has to be placed around the family and their guests, and the staff would rather set everything out before the doors open.
What should the card say?
Keep it short. One line, such as “With deepest sympathy” or “Thinking of you all,” and your full name are enough. If you knew the person well, add one specific memory of them.
How much does it cost to send flowers to a funeral home?
It depends on the piece. A standing spray or a wreath for the service is larger and built by hand to order, so it costs more than a vase arrangement or a plant for the home. Our funeral flower price guide goes through each piece.
Can you order through the funeral home’s website instead?
You can. For the funeral homes near our shop, the Send Flowers button opens a store run by another company. Calling us instead lets you describe the person and the colors they loved before anything is made.
